Maybe it's normal for you

I've been blank for almost seven months. I wasn't in to boys before but there's some unreasonable reasons why I have written so many "MUST BE" to a boy that I will adore. You know what I mean?

Add the fact that I was infatuated to three boys in a month and ended up being so blank and acted like I never knew them in the first place. It was like a flash of a digital camera and the captured photo is blurry and almost like filled with orbs. Well, maybe they're not for me... or somehow, I just forced my ego to like them in a way I wouldn't deny that I am that blank , having a very boring teenage life.

But you see, it doesn't matter anyway. I was happy being blank yeah, somehow it's sad because there is this feeling of being so alone and it feels like I don't exist. Just consider that I have the Narcissus Complex Syndrome. Okay, get the idea. Then, I just decided to just wait until my heart will start to beat in a very weird manner where I cannot sleep, cannot eat, cannot think except of course the name of the person that will eventually reason for this matter. Arghh.

Now, it happened. The moment that I've been waiting for the past weeks. Well, it feels weird. My blood rushing through my veins, my heart pounding so fast that I cannot even hear my voice and my eyes glimmering against the moon on that very cold evening. I know, inside me this ain't just a typical story. The feeling of the ultimate and unavoidable emotion struck me and I cannot even think straight.I've been thinking if I should or shouldn't tell you about this... but I am afraid you might start to think that its to flitting or whatsoever that could be possible reason of rejection...wait scratch that, avoiding is the right term.

It's not bad liking you. There are no laws created or stated that it is unlawful, unethical, or perhaps nonsense to like somebody. Arghh. There are millions of butterflies in my stomach and this blog is contradicting now. I feel weird. I think i am yeah, undeniably, irrevocably in love to the person I consider the spirit of the awesome anime fan of mine. Err.

Now, I wanted to tell you but I cannot.
I am not afraid, but i just cannot tell you.
I am not a coward, but i cannot tell you.
Well...hoping that our feelings will be mutual. Yeah, I am assuming again.
COME WHAT MAY what the hell.
I am happy that I am officially in love.
Hey, anyone? You know him? You better know him.