for Erica

Pavements

The sun rises, I close my eyes and begin to travel

Along a diverged path with endless sequel.

I, alone traveling miles to see what awaits

In a walk full of hopes and dreams of these fates.

I sing a song as I saunter every roadless travel

Counting all joyous things in my life in an aisle.

Life isn't that cruel, I say as I keep things intact

Though I cried million times in an unstable fact.

Moving little by little, reaching the every goal

The hardships I had never bothered my soul

For a man's life never reveals any success

If sadness or laughter never assessed.

The sun sets, I opened my eyes I see the world

Once in our lives we see something new as if twirled,

Never say no if you haven't took a single step

Along the pavement, as it where life begins until the depth.

Ever wonder why the sun sets and the stars aren't visible at daylight? Nothing last forever... I hope you know that.

-Mice

Moon and Stars

I watched the stars, I see you.

I kissed away, I missed you

Keep me safe as I fly alone...

-Mice

Iron Winged Angel

...and then you came along with your wings shattered, melodies unfinished just for me. You fly with my heart on your eyes...

-Mice

Roadless

I travelled along the streets for the stars
With the darkness of the night alone I walk
Seeing nobody but my shadow behind crossbars
And the pavements I dreamt before, never did I blocked.
Hearing the wind, I wouldn't mind if I stumble
Feeling the sound of the night as my heart shrinks
Would I ever cry as I saunter along this gamble?
Would I ever smile if I think of you even if it's jinxed?
Now the coast is clear, all I see is blackness of the night
You wouldn't know that I'd be here anyway
For I walked away without you knowing with all my fright...
Because there's this agony on this roadless travel, I ran away.

Release. Delete.

I'll travel the sky to reach the moon so I can dance there.

ENGLISH: Three Words; Three Syllables

To TROI

We sing rhymes and hear chimes
Thinking of flying while I see those mimes...

You sauntered, I captured your breath
I lingered into your soul's unending depth.

As for the days and nights I saw your eyes,
In every single blink of those fireflies

Dreaming of you as if I'd fly with the birds,
Believing to be with you in different worlds.

Now, I sing a single song of no rhymes
Until I'll hold your hand even if in the mistimes

You showed me something I haven't felt for a long time
And I know, somehow this isn't for lifetime.

With my eyes shut, I'll show you my wings
I LOVE YOU... this is how my heart sings.

Iron Heart

So I flow with the wind on the other side
Seeing you flock your wings so wide
Never I wanted to see you in a downfall
Nor to see you shed tears like a waterfall.

You played your music with your voice so calm,
Wondering through the day while we hold your palm.
A single song you seemed to hear every night,
Until the break of dawn of another's flight.

The eyes that remembered our shattered soul
You kept us showing the wonderful world's parole.
Little did we know how fast the time goes,
Now we see you with your wings and airflows

Trapped in a world where heaven is clear,
The voice that I've known is now austere!
Oh the heart so weak I cannot hold!
Wishing an iron heart for you to stand strong as you have told.

Just to see how life goes.

What's the difference between reality and fantasy? Words flipping into my head and somehow, i don't want it to linger.

You have to make sense when talking about fantasy.
Fantasy is like a drawing an image or perhaps playing an image in photoshop. What I mean is, you can redo and undo it. It's up to you, you can control fantasy...

And that's how our life moves, so painful, so unfair and we can never undo or redo it. This is reality.

Igniting a single fire

Sometimes, we need to face the truth. Let's face the fact that the truth hurts and yeah...really it sucks.
Now, face the truth that the world is slowly dying. Look around you, feel the sun burning your skin little by little... hear the earthquakes and thunders that resonates throughout the ocean... feel the wind's abrupt swift, so dark, so sad...so humid.

The world is giving up, and believe it or not we'll all die...soon.

AMANE MISA COSPLAY

DEATH NOTE FANATIC MUCH.
YEAH I KNOW RIGHT. I'M MISA .

HOW ABOUT THINKING FOR THE OTHERS?

I'M HUNGRY. I WANT TO EAT MY BREAKFAST, LUNCH AND DINNER EVERYDAY.

Imagine, you have a happy family...with all the considerations with your extra curricular activities with your friends, consideration in school activities, gadgets, tv, books, clothes and whatsoever.
They provide the needs but you see, gambling is number one here. Poker, Jueteng, bla bla bla bla...and then the time will come, you ask for your dinner and they won't even give a damn because they are busy gambling! AND PLUS THE FACT THAT THEY WILL GIVE YOU NOTHING BECAUSE THE MONEY WAS SPENT TO BE GAMBLED.

2012: It would be okay for me

If the "2012-end-of-the-world" will really happen, it would not be a problem for me.
WHY?

First, I will never think about going to college;
My mom will never go to London to make money for our tuition;
We will never think about paying bills (water bill, internet, cable, etc..)
I will no longer crave for Mcdonald's fries; and so many more.

Think about it. What if it will really happen? Don't be afraid because we will all vanish together...
Hunger will no longer exist. Crime. Scandal. Evil. Gambling. Cockroaches. Rats. Reality shows. Competition and Justin Bieber will no longer dominate us. We will all disappear...together and rest our breaths...

We'll all gonna die somehow

Heard about the frightful earthquakes happening all over the globe? The disasters happening in some parts of the earth? Can you feel that the world is getting hotter and hotter everyday? Can you notice that there's something weird and irrevocable happening around us?... we are so close, so close to death.

Maybe, the 2012 thingy is real. The end of the world---that we will all die, that Jesus Christ will come to earth and save us again but you see, whatever it is, or it may be true or not, somehow we will all gonna die. Believe me when I say it. For there is no forever...nothing last forever!

Notice, the earthquakes are happening like a domino effect. The natural phenomena's are becoming so odd, just for example, here in the Philippines, we are now experiencing a COLD SUMMER. Huh. Good news for some, but HELLO! this ain't normal!

Who's fault is it anyway? of course us, human beings. We are too liberated, self-centered, selfish and whatsoever that we always want something best for ourselves! We don't even think for the others. Economy is getting worse every year... the rich people are getting richer and the poor? they are dying. Perhaps, the 2012 might be a good thing to happen...

Keep Your Head Spinning

Everyday, I do the same routine over and over.
Since my second semester in first year college was over, there began my oh-so-boring life. I'm back in my own house with the twenty-four hour internet connection, television, real food and yeah... i won't do my laundry again. With this kind of life, well I cannot deny that it is really cool but now, i feel awkward.

I've been away from home for ten months. I lived alone in a house with strangers. I learned how to clean my own room. To wash dishes. To do my laundry. To bla bla bla bla....
Too bad, my Mom told me I should go back home because my health is on risk. Oh well.. i felt happy but somehow, I realized being away from home will help me to...ugh, you know what I mean.

Now, I am doing nothing. I feel so dumb.

Defying TIME

Defying Time

I never asked something in return. I told you my words not because I wanted you to be like me… I told you those words because I don’t want to be stupid, I don’t want to hide it from you every time you are near.


Professionals told me time is infinite. There are so many clichés and wisdoms about time…that time is endless, time is a treasure and so on.
So, if time is infinite, how come some students and workers are being scolded being late? If time is infinite, why do they have to establish a law regarding curfew hours? If time is infinite, why parents give us the limitation to goof around with our friend? If time is infinite, why do the actors and actresses in the movie always say “we don’t have much time”? Even if this is absurd matter, soon, you’ll realize.
Why do they still use the phrase “take your time” if we always end up burdened with rude words or negative consequences when do not meet the time? If time is gold, why is that many are suffering from poverty? Why do they invent such words, phrases, clichés, analogies, metaphors or whatsoever if they are contradicting it with their actions? You see, it’s nice to have those “time concepts” in connection to our daily lives, but I just realized, time isn’t infinite. Time is just an imagination. Time is represented in numbers. Time does not exist…we were motivated that time runs in our lives. TIME IS A FANTASY.
Yes we have morning, afternoon and evening. We have the sun, the moon and the stars. We have day and night…and my point is, our body is designed to perform its different functions. Get that? If you’re hungry, you eat. If you want to sleep, you sleep. If you want to do anything, you do that “anything” of yours. Do we really need to know the time? Say, 8 in the morning, you must eat. What if you are not hungry or either way? Would you still force yourself to eat, or would you still wait until the clock strikes at 8? I mean, hey, is it really necessary? Time is infinite. Take your time. Time is gold. Then, we end up facing terrible consequences because WE DID NOT MEET THE TIME.

Life is unfair. Life is absurd. This life we have is what you call a fairy tale… and the ending? No one knows yet. Let’s wait for it.

Nanoseconds

I held my breath. I was thinking of it since the day I left from home. Been thinking of it 24/7 and it just suck because I knew that you... you're just one of the few stupid worthless things in the planet. Then, without any knowing... no assumptions or whatsoever, you came. again.

If L was Gay

If L was Gay inspiration: ALDRIN SHROOM

IF L WAS GAY, HE’LL CHANGE THE WORLD TO ITS HIGHEST POSSIBLE FORM
What if there are no lies? What if hate doesn’t exist? What if we don’t know feigning? Then the meaning of truth, happiness, love and honesty will be meaningless for us. But my point here is that…what if people will realize that being able to express what you feel, what you know right is not showing some superiority or perhaps inferiority? Then, there will be no more headaches.
Majority of the people I know told me I am weird. I got that. I am really weird. Why? Many reasons, maybe for you its normal and for them it’s not normal but that’s not it either…I am just me. If seeing the world as a big pot hole makes me weird enough, I won’t mind… I have my own perspective in my life and so with you…right? Some people just don’t get it because I know, they are afraid to tell the world who they are.
So here’s the thing. Here’s the thing I wanted to put here. If you know the anime manga series Death Note, you’ll follow this right away if not….err just read it. Anyway this will make sense to you and the rest of the world. Now, what if L Lawliet was gay? A friend of mine gave me an idea to create this one…he resembles my perception about life. I mean, he too, perceives the world differently as I do. Nevertheless, his life is dramatic because I saw the stiff zigzag roads he traveled when he told me the truth behind his odd words of life. Are you still following? I hope so. He sees the world in a way I can also see it in reality.
Why is it that today, many people tries to manipulate others conscientiously or not? Why bother to offer an ear to share heartaches when some out there wouldn’t really get your point?...and sadly, they’ll judge you in the end. Why do we need to pretend that we are someone that we’re not, when in fact we can do whatever we want in this world? Because we are afraid to be hated…to be a laughing material and to be avoided…maybe, but why? Can they not just accept the fact? Or who am I to be speaking like this… I’m a human. I have thoughts just like you but, this is mine.
Okay, let’s see. If L was gay, what would happen? What would happen to the world? Aldrin said, the world would be a bed of flowers (literary). That would be nice, right? So, if we all die, we will die in a flowery land.
If L was gay, what would happen to the Philippines? Aldrin said, the national costume would be bikinis. The carabao would be no longer the national animal…(actually, I forgot what he told me, so I wrote it that way.)
If L was gay then he’ll change the world to something we don’t see every day.

DEFINITE

It doesn't matter how fast or slow the momentum is...
I do not care if the law of motion will be defied. I don't care.
Now, I am beginning to state words that makes me wonder.

I need no effort.
I need no much attention but of course, i don't want to be ignored.
Like counting the stars under a morning light... absurd but you can if you believe that you can.

Everyday, I am seeing the world like i never existed here before.
I'm smiling...for the fact that I barely do it.
Maybe...it's flitting but what? are there laws? did I violate anything? If so, tell me... I won't hinder.

Don't ask me why. Someday, you'll know.
Someday, you'll be able to describe the taste of water.
In anyways, you'll understand me, if the feelings will be mutual.

I don't want to end like an epic failure of the year...
I am happy.
I am happy.
I am happy.

Yeah..I can move on

because i fall two good legs. functioning.. flawless and yes... i can walk. and move forward. no reason to lament over and over. no reason to be stuck in one place when pure lies exist.

University Of The Philippines Baguio
Film Festival Presents

PAMAHI



the ugly truth... find me there. Haha

Freedom of Expression

For all the concern citizens in this country...or in this world perhaps... are you aware of the so-called "FREEDOM OF EXPRESSION"? If no...let me tell you.

It is your power to express what you feel towards a person... or perhaps in the whole world, but in a good way.

Talk about that stuff

This year, is a total headache!
How i wish I could share this stressful pain with you so you can lament with me.

I am hungry

What if i kill you right now, would you tell me how would I do that?
you know, it takes time to think of a plan. yeah. perhaps, i am being nonsense again. sorry... i am quite preoccupied lately.

You're more like an Ocean to me

Before, i thought you were like the stars above the sky... seeing me wherever I go. But no... i thought you were like the river that is flowing endlessly on this earth no matter how far you go and that I'm drowning but i am keeping myself alive just to be with you...

Now, i realized that your not the river... not even the pond...not even the sun or the moon just because you're light?( If you know what I mean.) Huh.

You are the ocean.
on this earth you fill up everything that is possible.
with your waves...swinging back and forth every minute.

Even though how long you will touch my soul again,
i know you will come back...
i know...somehow

We have all the time to see the world

Sometimes, I never thought of having a good future after college. I never pictured myself having my own family ( you know, husband and kids..ughh ). Maybe somehow, i am much focused on my education.

Currently, I am at studying away from home...and now, we've decided that i must go back to the place where I started everything...

It's not worth it having college, with all the high grades and everything if you're not happy about it...

Well... this isn't for me. I'm going back.:)

I wouldn't ask

I assumed for thousand times... i don't want to do it.
I wanted to know if you... yes you... feel the same way I feel for you.
If the feelings are mutual...let me know, for i will never forfeit this feeling.

I don't know why. I don't believe into those theories that are being published and scribbled in this world.
I believe in my own beliefs. It just happen. It just happen. It just happen.

Everything I do now makes sense. I know for the fact that I am liking you everyday and yeah... i like you. I wanted you to know but I wont tell you. Somehow, I'm hoping i could but I don't want to hear your voice...your answer. I'm assuming again.


Arghh... I hope you'll read this. And I hope you know it's you I like..

Maybe it's normal for you

I've been blank for almost seven months. I wasn't in to boys before but there's some unreasonable reasons why I have written so many "MUST BE" to a boy that I will adore. You know what I mean?

Add the fact that I was infatuated to three boys in a month and ended up being so blank and acted like I never knew them in the first place. It was like a flash of a digital camera and the captured photo is blurry and almost like filled with orbs. Well, maybe they're not for me... or somehow, I just forced my ego to like them in a way I wouldn't deny that I am that blank , having a very boring teenage life.

But you see, it doesn't matter anyway. I was happy being blank yeah, somehow it's sad because there is this feeling of being so alone and it feels like I don't exist. Just consider that I have the Narcissus Complex Syndrome. Okay, get the idea. Then, I just decided to just wait until my heart will start to beat in a very weird manner where I cannot sleep, cannot eat, cannot think except of course the name of the person that will eventually reason for this matter. Arghh.

Now, it happened. The moment that I've been waiting for the past weeks. Well, it feels weird. My blood rushing through my veins, my heart pounding so fast that I cannot even hear my voice and my eyes glimmering against the moon on that very cold evening. I know, inside me this ain't just a typical story. The feeling of the ultimate and unavoidable emotion struck me and I cannot even think straight.I've been thinking if I should or shouldn't tell you about this... but I am afraid you might start to think that its to flitting or whatsoever that could be possible reason of rejection...wait scratch that, avoiding is the right term.

It's not bad liking you. There are no laws created or stated that it is unlawful, unethical, or perhaps nonsense to like somebody. Arghh. There are millions of butterflies in my stomach and this blog is contradicting now. I feel weird. I think i am yeah, undeniably, irrevocably in love to the person I consider the spirit of the awesome anime fan of mine. Err.

Now, I wanted to tell you but I cannot.
I am not afraid, but i just cannot tell you.
I am not a coward, but i cannot tell you.
Well...hoping that our feelings will be mutual. Yeah, I am assuming again.
COME WHAT MAY what the hell.
I am happy that I am officially in love.
Hey, anyone? You know him? You better know him.

beni[g]ht[e]d, I withsta[n]d for you

And i hope, you can feel the every word I've scribbled.
This is for you.
Try to decipher the red ink. :)